


this love

by roseq



Series: all you wanted was to be wanted [1]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Daddy Kink, M/M, Trans Character, but not rly, trans josh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-09
Updated: 2016-03-09
Packaged: 2018-05-25 15:53:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6201499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseq/pseuds/roseq
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>josh is trans and having a bad dysphoria day. tyler tries to help him out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	this love

Josh was having a hard time being the drummer of twenty one pilots. It wasn’t the drumming or Tyler that bothered him. It was himself. Sometimes he would watch videos of himself drumming, watching himself bounce and giggle as he drummed on stage. He had come so far but he still felt like he was fake, a lie. 

During the concert the next night Tyler could feel Josh’s energy was off. He was on it musically but didn’t seem on it emotionally. Tyler loved looking over and seeing his best friend happily bouncing along to their music but this time it was different. Less energized. More closed off. 

After the concert Tyler went up to Josh. “Hey, man. Great show,” he said, hugging Josh’s sweaty body. Josh half-heartedly hugged him back. “What’s wrong, Joshy?” Tyler questioned, trying to catch Josh’s eyes. 

Josh looked at him with heavy eyes. “Nothing. I’m fine. I’m okay,” Josh said, trying to stand up a bit taller and fake a smile. 

Tyler wasn’t falling for this, but he sure didn’t know what was going on. They got back in the bus and traveled to the hotel for the night. Josh just sat silently, staring into space or on his phone the whole time. 

Once they got to the hotel and Josh and Tyler went to their room, Tyler tried to talk to Josh again. “Hey, I know you’re not doing well right now and you don’t have to talk about it but I am going to try to help. Okay?”

Josh sat on the bed leaning against the headboard and Tyler sat next to him, hugging him. There was silence for a minute. It wasn’t uncomfortable; it just was. 

Eventually Josh found some words. “Even though I’ve come so far I still worry that I will never be a real man.” His voice shrunk as he said it. 

“What are you talking about, Josh?” Tyler said, a little surprised. He had known Josh before he had even started to transition and hadn’t heard these doubts before. Josh was always his ray of sunshine and to see him like this was devastating. 

“I’m never going to be like you, so secure in your gender... I always fear,” Josh said tears pooling in his eyes. 

At this point Tyler could not just let Josh talk about himself like this. He sat on Josh’s lap facing him and wiped his now falling tears away with this thumb while caressing Josh’s face.

“You are the most handsome, honest, and good man I have ever met. Not to mention sexy.” He leaned in and gave Josh a soft kiss. 

Josh smiled and blushed a little. “Do you mean it, Tyler?”

“Yes, Josh. I do. You are an amazing man and I love you.” 

 

Tyler drew a bubble bath and put Taylor Swift’s discography on shuffle. “Come on, Joshy. Come relax with me. I promise it will help you feel better.”

“Alright, Tyler,” Josh said slowly walking into the bathroom. 

Tyler could see Josh tense up once he saw the bubble bath. “It’ll be okay, Josh. I promise,” he said, kissing Josh and helping him take his shirt off. He kissed down Josh’s chest to his belly button. Josh tried not to giggle, because Tyler was being really hot, but also his kisses tickled.

Tyler looked up at Josh. “You ready?” Josh nodded. Tyler unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down. “You’re so beautiful, Josh.” 

Tyler undressed himself and got into the tub, letting Josh undress himself the rest of the way and join him. 

Josh slowly lowered himself into the hot bath. He looked at Tyler, sitting across from him. He looked angelic and glowing somehow in the odd hotel bathroom lighting. He loved him. After all they had been through together, after all they had made together, he truly loved him. 

“What?” Tyler said, giggling a little bit. Josh hadn’t realized he was staring for that long. 

“You’re pretty amazing, and I’m pretty gay,” Josh said, smiling a big goofy smile. 

“Oh my gosh, Joshy,” Tyler said splashing bubbles and warm water on him. 

Josh cupped a blob of bubbles and held it up to his chin. “The beard earlier in the year didn’t go too well, but I think this one is coming along nicely,” he laughed, pretending to stroke his bubble beard. 

“Very nice,” Tyler agreed. 

The boys stayed in the bath for a while, being silly, singing, and kissing at times, but once their hands started to show how long they’d been in there, they decided to get out. Just as they were getting out, drying off, and wiping what was left of the bubbles off themselves, “This Love” started playing from the Taylor Swift mix. Tyler went to Josh and wrapped his arms around him. Josh’s colorful floof of hair was damp and stuck to his forehead. Tyler was amazed by how such a hot, handsome man could doubt himself like he had earlier. 

 

The boys were tired from their long day, so they decided to snuggle up and watch The X-Files until they fell asleep. The boys laid together on the bed. Josh looked ahead to watch Scully and Mulder up to the usual supernatural adventures, but Tyler couldn’t help but keep his eyes on Josh. 

Part way through the show Josh noticed this and started to shift in the bed until his butt was right up against Tyler’s crotch. Josh swore he could hear Tyler whisper “fuck” to himself once he realized what was going on. 

“Huh?” Josh questioned. 

“I didn’t say anything,” Tyler answered kissing the back of Josh’s head. Josh was pretty sure Tyler was lying. 

Tyler tried to redirect his focus toward the computer. Josh stopped teasing Tyler toward the end of the episode. By the time the credits rolled Josh could feel Tyler’s boner on his ass. 

“Mulder gets me pretty hot too,” Josh joked, putting the laptop on the ground and turning to kiss Tyler. 

“Are you sure you’re okay with this, Josh?” Tyler asked, a little worried. 

Josh smiled and started kissing Tyler’s neck. “Yes, Tyler. I’m sure,” Josh said between kisses. 

Tyler moaned softly. Josh kissed down Tyler’s neck just hard enough to leave marks he knew would be covered by stage makeup the next day. 

Tyler pushed Josh over onto his back and straddled him. He kissed him hard but oh-so carefully. Josh grabbed onto Tyler while they kissed. He needed him so badly. 

Tyler started kissing down Josh’s chest, glancing up to make sure Josh was still alright. Tyler gently bit Josh’s nipple and Josh moaned and arched his back a little, grabbing onto the bed. 

Tyler kissed down Josh’s tum, using one hand to hold Josh’s. He kissed down past his bellybutton and was about to pull Josh’s boxers off. Josh squeezed his hand a little, and when Tyler looked up to check to see if he was okay, Josh looked uneasy. 

Tyler stopped and plopped down on the bed next to Josh. “Hey, are you okay?” he asked. 

“Tyler, I’m so sorry, I just can’t do this tonight. I’m sorry. I thought I could bu-” Josh was interrupted by a gentle kiss. 

“It’s okay, Josh. It’s okay,” Tyler said, hugging Josh. “Your comfort is my number one concern.”

Tyler laid his head on Josh’s chest, drawing patterns on his skin with his fingers and kissing his chest every now and then. 

Josh caught himself falling asleep. “Goodnight, baby boy,” Josh murmured. 

“Goodnight, daddy,” Tyler murmured back. 

“Tyler, never call me that again.”

**Author's Note:**

> sorry about the daddy thing at the end.
> 
> my joshler/top tumblr is happyjoshua.tumblr.com


End file.
